Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence—men, women, entry-level employees and big-time founders and CEOs. Even after the awareness raised by the #MeToo movement, many survivors still fear the repercussions of speaking out against their abusers.
But that’s the very thing that can help break the cycle, says Michelle Jewsbury, who founded the nonprofit Unsilenced Voices. Jewsbury told her own story of surviving violent abuse in her memoir But I Love Him: A True Story of Love, Pain, and Domestic Violence. In her book, she details a terrifying relationship with a powerful ex-boyfriend who countersued her for defamation when she eventually took him to court. Now, in both her nonprofit and through her own business as a speaker and coach, Jewsbury is working to empower survivors worldwide to weaponize their stories against a vicious cycle of abuse.
Unsilenced Voices primarily operates in Sierra Leone, Rwanda and Ghana, where the organization works directly with survivors of abuse and human trafficking to get them back on their feet. Their many outreach initiatives include sex education programs, counseling, sensitization training to raise awareness about violence and how to stop and prevent it, financial assistance and vocational training. Currently, the organization is fundraising to build a residential vocational school to teach girls traditional crafts and skills so they have business opportunities to get them into better circumstances.
Last year, the organization published its first volume of Breaking the Silence: Voices of Survivors, which features essays by survivors of domestic violence, sexual assault, human trafficking, addiction, serious illness and mental health emergencies. The organization is now seeking authors for its fourth volume.
“The biggest thing is [survivors] understanding that they’re not alone and that their story has power,” Jewsbury says, “that their story is impactful and can help people. Oftentimes, when people hold onto their stories and don’t tell them, it is actually hurting the population around them.”
If you’re reading this, she says, you can be part of the solution too.
If you’re a survivor: Your story can set you free—and help your community
There are endless reasons people may be afraid of opening up about assault. It can be stigmatizing for anyone, Jewsbury says, even people who otherwise already have power or status through their job. Part of her work right now is to help survivors write down their stories in the form of books, to gain control of their own narratives and dispel myths about abuse.
One of those myths is that “successful” people aren’t at risk of intimate partner violence. While research has shown that lower-income people are at higher risk, domestic abuse is a problem that spans all income levels.
“A lot of people think that domestic violence just happens to lower- and middle-class families, lower socioeconomic families, and that’s not accurate,” Jewsbury says. “I know so many affluent individuals who have experienced domestic violence. One of my clients right now is a super-successful doctor.”
It can therefore be incredibly impactful when someone who doesn’t fit the stereotypes of a survivor opens up about what they have gone through. It can help people who are currently experiencing abuse to realize that what’s happening to them isn’t normal and that they need to seek help.
“When clients typically come to me, in the beginning, they don’t think they have a story,” Jewsbury says. “They’re scared to tell their story because of fear of rejection, of fear of people putting them down, or different words of abuse that other people could say to them. We work together to help them determine that their story matters. We work together to help women understand that there’s multiple people who have experienced similar adversities and that they really can make a difference by speaking up.”
If you’re in trouble: Seek help and strategize your exit
If you’re in an abusive situation, or you know someone who is, there is help. Start by talking to someone you trust, or contact a local agency in your community with resources to get you to a safe place.
Jewsbury also suggests strategizing your exit.
“The strategy is very similar—if you’re a business owner or constructing a business plan, you literally strategize to escape the relationship,” she says.
When she was crafting her own exit plan, she knew her abuser wouldn’t help her financially, so she made extra car payments to pay it down faster. She contacted someone she trusted whom she could stay with while she got back on her feet. And she started budgeting for her exit, knowing that her finances would change dramatically once she got out.
If you’re in a position of power: Create an open-door policy
If you’re in a position of power at a company, you may be able to help employees in dangerous situations simply by opening your door to them. Jewsbury suggests having contact information on hand for local agencies that are equipped to help victims of abuse. Look up the organizations in your community that offer services to help people get out of dangerous situations so that you’re not on your own in trying to help someone in need. You can also clearly state in your company handbook and employee onboarding process that your door is open.
“Being an employer that has your employees’ back is so profound,” Jewsbury says, adding that an open-door policy can build trust with employees and ultimately have a positive impact on the business.
“Now, you may not be a therapist, you may not be a counselor—this is not your expertise,” she says. “But knowing that you are not going to take their story and defame them, [or] spread rumors about them, that you are here to help them… When you have this opportunity to help your employees, they typically will stay with your company and work even harder for you.”
If you or someone you know needs help, don’t be silent. You can get help via the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
This article originally appeared in the March/April 2025 issue or SUCCESS® magazine. Photo by fizkes/shutterstock.com.
