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What Your Coping Mechanism Says About You

We can all struggle with how to cope at certain times. Whether it’s being stressed about meeting deadlines at work or dealing with a child’s illness, life can take its toll. Factors like your environment and childhood experiences affect how you deal with stressors.

Understanding your coping mechanisms can help you understand yourself better. It can also help you lean into healthy coping mechanisms that are essential to facing life’s challenges. 

With adequate coping strategies, you can increase your emotional resilience and flexibility. In addition, you can strengthen your overall capacity for self and social awareness. Learn the basics of coping skills here and how to develop healthy ones with these powerful tips.

Understanding Coping Mechanisms

Coping mechanisms are thought and behavior strategies activated to help you manage difficult situations. Your early life experiences and environment shape your development of coping behaviors. They serve important roles in helping you address sources of stress and get through life’s challenges. 

These tactics can help you regulate negative emotional reactions to stress such as anger, fear, anxiety and shame. This can be done by practicing internal mechanisms of self-awareness. For instance, if you practice certain meditation techniques over time, you may develop an increased awareness of painful emotions. In turn, you’ll gain the appropriate emotional and behavioral responses to cope with them.

Coping mechanisms can be healthy and adaptive. For example, seeking support from a friend, using relaxation techniques or getting proper sleep can be healthy ways to cope. A person may also have unhealthy and maladaptive strategies, such as yelling at someone, excessive drinking or binge eating.

In general, coping mechanisms can be divided into proactive (seeking to neutralize future stressors) and reactive (reacting to stressors after an event). These fall within four categories: Problem-focused, emotion-focused, meaning-focused and social coping.

Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Healthy coping mechanisms are important for your mental well-being. They can help you improve resilience while decreasing stress, depression and anxiety. For instance, seeking the support of a close friend as a coping strategy improves your ability to face difficult situations. Healthy coping can include mindfulness, positive affirmations and practicing self-soothing activities.

Choosing healthy coping behaviors can also be self-reinforcing. This is because it helps you continue choosing adaptive behaviors. For example, experiencing the benefits of a long walk in nature after a stressful day can motivate you to make the same choice the next time you need it.

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Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

Unhealthy coping skills, such as drinking excessively or overeating, can hinder our ability to solve problems. They also increase stress and prevent emotional processing. Unhealthy coping can also decrease our psychological resilience.

Learning to use healthy ways of dealing with stressors can have a major impact. Just taking the time to breathe deeply during stressful moments or signing up for that yoga class can go a long way. Healthy methods can improve your quality of life. This includes long-term self-esteem, relationships and physical and psycho-emotional well-being.

Behavioral Adaptation

Behavioral adaptation plays a crucial role in how you deal with life’s stressors. As you adapt your responses to stressors, you develop the resilience and capacity to face and solve difficult challenges. An example might be talking with your partner about your stressful day instead of being avoidant.

Some professional recommendations for transitioning to healthy coping mechanisms include: 

  • Identifying specific triggering situations leading to maladaptive behaviors 
  • Developing new healthy habits to replace negative behaviors
  • Seeking professional support

Self-Soothing Techniques

Self-soothing techniques can improve your sleep quality and emotional self-regulation. Self-soothing requires heightened self-awareness, which can foster self-understanding and nurture your inner peace. 

When you have a difficult day or feel anxious, practice self-soothing techniques. These might be deep breathing exercises, sitting meditation, nature bathing or drawing.

The Power of Positive Emotions

Cultivating nourishing experiences with positive emotions can be a healthy way to cope. These emotions include happiness, caring, gratitude and calmness. For example, you might spend quality time with your partner or reward yourself after finishing a challenging project. These experiences can help you better cope with adverse situations and increase your resilience. In addition, it can also improve sleep, social integration and overall well-being. 

Nourishing positive emotions can also help you continue choosing adaptive strategies to cope with adverse situations. Focusing on positive emotions reduces the impact of negative emotional experiences. Ready to see growth and achieve optimal well-being? Make time for those nourishing, positive experiences.  

To cultivate positive emotions in our daily lives, psychologist and clinical professor of psychiatry Jenny Taitz recommends the following activity. It’s simple but has been found beneficial in multiple studies. Start by planning one daily activity that will make you happy or give you a sense of fulfillment. After enjoying it, savor the detailed memories of the most joyful experience of your life.

Looking for other ways to nourish positive emotions? Try expanding your joy vocabulary, sharing your highlight reel, forecasting future victories or finding silver linings.

Finding Solace In Relaxation

Relaxation techniques can help you improve your physical and psychological health. For instance, they can improve your brain function, mood, sleep quality and focus. They can also lower blood pressure and reduce stress, anxiety and depression.

Some techniques I have incorporated into my life over the years include yoga asanas, tai chi, breathing exercises, progressive relaxation, walking in nature and various meditation practices.

Harnessing The Power Of Positive Affirmations

We can all enjoy the benefits of positive affirmations. For instance, they can be beneficial when we experience imposter syndrome. Positive affirmations are statements we tell ourselves in our head or out loud to help induce a healthy and motivating attitude. They can help us decrease negative thoughts (such as fear, self-doubt, and anxiety). At the same time, positive affirmations can also increase self-confidence, improve mood and change our outlook on life.

Positive affirmations foster resilience and self-empowerment, reinforcing our sense of resourcefulness and agency. Examples of positive affirmations include things like: “Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today” and “Every day above earth is a good day.”You can also get creative and write down positive affirmations that feel empowering and apply to your circumstances.

Having strong community support can be an important source of strength for all of us. It’s essential to cultivating a balanced life and facing adversity and challenges. Most of us have felt more empowered and emotionally supported when we’ve had social support during stressful times.

Social support can also help us feel less lonely and less stressed. When we’re part of a community, we have a sense of belonging. These things can all ultimately enhance physical and emotional well-being.

Being with people who encourage you and validate your emotions supports your overall well-being. In fact, research on happiness found that the quality of connections is a very significant factor in happiness and longevity.

Bottom line? Next time you’re going through a rough time and feel like isolating yourself, try seeking quality support from a person or group you trust.

Utilizing Coping Skills Worksheets

No matter how strong we think we are, we can all benefit from having multiple tools in our coping strategies arsenal. Incorporating coping skills worksheets is another empowering tool that fosters healthy processing. Use them to help compare healthy vs. unhealthy coping mechanisms. Try worksheets to reflect on your current coping abilities and develop new ones.

Coping skills worksheets may increase your emotional resilience. You can also use them to challenge negative thoughts, cope with criticism and process grief.

Healthy Strategies for Coping

The best coping strategies for you depend on your unique personal needs, goals and preferences. This is why it’s essential to know what your current coping skills are and what new skills you’d like to incorporate. 

Try out different coping mechanisms that fit your needs. Remember to remain flexible in discovering which new strategies can be the most effective. Consider these ideas:

Problem-Focused Strategies

These strategies involve considering an issue and taking active steps to reduce the stress surrounding it. For example: 

  • Creating a to-do list and planning your week
  • Taking breaks when necessary
  • Preparing for work activities ahead of time

Emotion-Focused Strategies

Emotion-focused strategies can reduce negative emotions associated with the stress you’re facing. For instance: 

  • Practicing a meditation that appeals to you
  • Using positive affirmations
  • Spending time in nature

Meaning-Focused Strategies

Meaning-focused strategies help you find meaning in situations, helping you to manage the stress or resolve the issue. For example: 

  • Looking at the benefits of a situation 
  • Reordering priorities 
  • Finding meaning in ordinary events

Social-Focused Strategies

Social-focused strategies involve gaining social support to ease distress, such as: 

  • Talking to a friend
  • Joining a support group 
  • Seeking professional help from a counselor or therapist

Empower Yourself With Healthy Coping Skills

Healthy, adaptive coping mechanisms allow you to face challenging situations. You’ll be empowered to manage stress levels, regulate your emotions and increase your resilience. This can lead to improved psychological well-being, emotional stability and better quality of life.  

Ready to get started on your journey toward healthier coping? Take time to reflect on and understand what coping strategies you currently use and think about what works for you. Look for ways to support appropriate emotional responses and increase capacity to solve problems. When you use coping strategies that work for you, you’ll reap the benefits.

Coping Mechanisms FAQs

1. What Are Maladaptive Coping Mechanisms?

Unhealthy coping strategies can hinder your capacity to solve life’s challenges and deal with stress. Examples may include excessive drinking, binge eating, anger, procrastination, fear and isolation.

Unhealthy coping mechanisms can also decrease your physical and emotional resilience. Recognizing maladaptive coping patterns improves your long-term self-esteem and quality of life.

2. How Can Someone Change Unhealthy Coping To Healthy Coping Mechanisms?

Many maladaptive coping behaviors develop during early life experiences. It’s hard to change these overnight, so give yourself self-compassion and patience as you learn. There are some specific actions you can take to switch from maladaptive coping mechanisms to more adaptive coping skills.

Learning to identify triggering situations that lead to unhealthy behaviors can help. In turn, you can develop new healthy habits to replace negative behaviors. You might also seek the support of a qualified mental health professional.

3. How Can Positive Emotions Impact My Overall Mental And Emotional Well-Being?

Nourishing positive emotions such as gratitude, calmness and inspiration can have long-term benefits. It can decrease chronic stress and negative impacts on the mind and body. At the same time, it can increase resilience and help people to deal with adverse events.

Positive emotions can also be self-reinforcing. They contribute to using healthy ways of coping under adverse circumstances. This ultimately helps us experience optimal well-being.

4. What Specific Coping Styles Do You Recommend?

These will depend on your personal preferences, specific challenges you face and personal needs and goals. For instance, some coping styles will be problem-focused. These may include planning, prioritizing and taking breaks as needed.

Others use emotion-focused strategies such as positive affirmations, journaling and practicing relaxation techniques. It’s important to understand your current life situation and explore coping styles that fit your unique needs.

Photo courtesy of Ground Picture/Shutterstock

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